This is my sister Rachel on her confirmation day. Rachel has 9P syndrome it is similar to autism, she can't write or type, but i think her stories are genius, without further ado, welcome to the world of Rachel McGrath
A quest to the new world
A poem written by Bjorn Nobilson himself
The center of the earthÉhow did Gallidore become the center of the earth. An execution, an execution would be oh so grand and oh so sad, your excellency. For our future residents I have seen the moon and stars Éfor you are the center of the earth. And that was all he wrote. And he also wrote the great book of spells. But there was a hidden secret about him. He built a secret castle for his nephew. He was sent to prison. Like the many kings before Hackman diedÉwas what he said. Oh Hacky boy, Oh, Hacky boy, how awful you smell. Oh Hacky boy was the song he sang over and over. After being tortured, he said hang me. Drats I still didnÕt get that moth. You will catch a moth one day my friend. Come let us throw rotten tomatoes.. But I seem to have killed the last of the carpet moths. CelebrateÉcelebrate. Boom, ba pa ba boomÉsmashing drums accompanied his execution. Why are you even celebrating this day. This fellow is going to die. They are celebrating because they hate his guts. Once Hacky is hung, then the prophecy will come true. Bring out the laws and rule he has broken, then we can began the songs and ceremony. I read all the laws and all the rules he has broken. Lets take a vote. All those in favor of hanging, raise their hand. All those in favor of not hanging, raise their hand. Well there you have it. Any last words Hackman........Mommy.
The end.
Big fat liar
Big fat liar, I need you to do me a favor. What kind of favor my lord. The kind that makes everyone powerful. What is that? Lies. You are based upon lies and more lies. That is why everyone calls you big fat liar. Oh that is right sire, I am a big fat liar. I am tired of waiting. Find me a pure hearted one. You have less than twenty hours. And no excuses. Aha, there is the pure hearted one. My dear friend, how would you like to join our team. You have fifteen minutes to decide and twenty seconds to live. What are you doingÉWhat is for dinner? Is it pizza.
The end.
BusterÕs Betrayal
Come on Killer, you and I know what to do. Just do what I do. That is exactly what Buster said years ago. And he told everyone that he would get 50% if they killed Good Mean bat. But the junkyard dogs became spoiled brats at the castle. Just like the tramps did, they became spoiled brats. And he told the tramp that his family would get 30% if he bumped off the princess. But they didnÕt do it. So killer and Buster stuck to their plan. But little did they know, Scamp and Angel were on their tail. That when they came up behind and brutally stabbed Good Mean bat and killed Professor Jenkins. And then Scamp asked, why are you being so violent Buster. It is my duty. Angry villagers with torches came after him. Poor killer got torched to death. Buster got hung. That is what some say. To this very day they donÕt know what happened. The secret was out in the mid 40Õs. Buster was sentenced to lay in the underworld. And this is what the jury said. They all raised their hands and said he was guilty, so they shoved him into the pit of time. LetÕs just say we hung him. That is what Good Mean bat said and they all agreed. Boy was he dripping with tears and a mess. He was on lot of drugs. Through depression he took drugs and bought drugs from drug dealers. But that stopped when the Princess and the Prince found out their own father was the Drug Lord. ThatÕs when Artie and his wife got the torch. Everything else is just a blur. As for Scarwell, no one found out what happened to him and no one ever will. Will you? And so Lady said alright, we will keep him and we will pull a couple of strings. That is how they got him into the palace because of YukiÕs grandfather. He got to pull some strings and in the end he got to live in the palace for free.
The end.
A Dark Shadow Warrior Returns
The battle we won, but I am sorry your family may never live again. Oh, Oh, they are all dead. It looks like Elda and her family are here all ready. Would you care for some food? Yeah. As promised, your bat pellets. Oh great, now he is going to chow down. He went without food for years and days. Let us see if he is all right. You are going to die, just like your grand father. You fight dirty, me donÕt like that. But at least the rats wonÕt be moving for a while. OhÉgot him. Heh, heh, your brother wonÕt live long, once the poison gets into him. Hand over the money or die. Never, you are never killing my baby brother. Stand your ground. Get him out of here, please. Hang on my grandson, I will pull that dagger out. Does y0ur shoulder hurt nephew? Stay here and rest. Yes my shoulder is in pain very much and it hurts. We are to finish him off, you monster. I have to attend to my baby. I will attend to my brotherÕs wounds. What happened? He killed Jakuda and stabbed me. No. Why did you kill Jakuda? He was my son and you killed him dark one. Get out of here before we change our minds. We have our mission. Take care of him is our mission. Remember Elda, he is yours to command now, within certain boundaries there comes death. And remember the gods are judging you so do try to keep up with them if you can. Wait. Drats he is gone. Who are you? Oh, I am sorry, I didnÕt introduce you to my other friends did I? We remember. There is Siraha and you are Chagoose. And you are Eon. You know them. Yeah they were at the Dojo years ago. Hm, what is Dojo anyway? I wonÕt tell you. LetÕs get back to the lab. I see Professor Drincon is there. I will get you one day and then you will be sorry my pretty. Our newest creation is almost done. IsnÕt it a masterpiece? We will win in the end. Quit being a goofball and get back to work. In the end, we will get you. We are not throughÉone day you will see that machine of yours will be ours.
The end.
A wedding of the century
Chapter 5000 & 5000, read in the great book of spells. He that is married, it is he who is crowned King and in the process, you will get the machine. But if you fail, the machine will destroy you. Any questions? Then begin the race. There is only one rule in this race. No poking at the fat one who is up in front. And no feeding the animals while racing. There will be no kicking, no punching, no spitting, no laughing at one another, no kicking, no running, no head butts. And last but no least, no spanking on the tushie. And no touching of the book of spells at all times. No kissing or hugging of the machine at all times. No talking to the machine at all times. No asking about his health condition. And donÕt even think about giving him medical attention. Unless you are his mummy and daddy, you canÕt touch him or uncles or aunts or friends or so. Otherwise, no touching the machine. DonÕt ever say the word bladder in front of him because he might think you are weird. DonÕt slap him. Begin the race. Before we begin, would Mr. Bat like to say a few words. DonÕt kick me on the way out. There you have it. Racers begin. Be careful out there and donÕt hit your head on the way out. You want me to go in the race. I couldnÕt. Go on. OK, here I go. WhatÕs this. AhhÉpoof. Cough, cough. We have a winner. Lucky for you, you won. But you are not so lucky, Sneero. You and your father built that rocket pad and you purposely cheated. You know something that I donÕt know. ThatÕs fine, donÕt tell me. And this is another opening chapter in life.LetÕs close this chapter of the book and move on.
Thank you. Well we didnÕt want you to go too slow because we know how slow you can be. Here is a computer image of how slow you would have been in the race. You see he can barely walk and flap at the same time. With the jet pack connected to him he can fly right past everyone else in the race. Of course I see what you mean. They are sending you a genius. Bring out the food. Fat pellets for lunch. For what, what did I do wrong. Nothing, just eat your pellets and be happy. They are puckishly delicious. So I am guessing the trophy will go over to you now. As soon as you are done polishing it, it will be in the mail by next week. It is here. The trophy is here, wake up. Sneero is a god trainer no matter what. It is not just me, but all of us are his trainers. We had better hurry on over to the church. Ok, Dad. The church is already open. Do you take this woman to be your lawful wedded bride. I do. Do you take this man to be your lawful wedded groom. I do. Do you hold this woman to be your bride forever. I do. Do you hold this man forever. I do. And unto sickness and health. We do. Then you may put the ring on the bride. You may kiss the bride. Where is the ring for me good mean bat. Spat. Thank you for holding on to it. You may kiss the bride now. Oh, I cannot look. Are they finished? Yes they are finished. Just sing these papers and he is yours.
The end.
A Burning Village
The dark nights have come. Arthur, you must build a place of peace. Help the villagers while I find out who is behind this. You heard what Merlin said. It is not Berlin; it is Merlin. Guinevere you come with me. Knights go with Arthur. Attack, attack, attack. Out of the way. If you donÕt want to be killed, step out of the way. Morgan, stop that machine. Can do Uncle Merlin. You hold it right there, Mr. Thomas. Or should I say, Sir Thomas. Arthur would like to speak to you. About what. My father wants peace. That is all he wants to talk about with you. If you donÕt stop fighting, you are never going to get peace. Who cares? As long as King Blarnaman and King Glanrnaman are alive, you donÕt get peace. Both of them have to die. Very well, continue on. Oh, I have been stabbed in my gut and injured in my shoulder. Sorry, your father canÕt talk to me right now; IÕm going to die. I will take care of him. You and the knights stop the men. Ok, Uncle Merlin. Arthur, the villagers, what about the villagers? Everybody out. Move out. That will teach you, you meddling machine. Put me down. You canÕt ride that horse. Who are you. My name is Guinevere. Mama? Hello daddy. Stay away from me. Stay away from me. WhatÕs wrong with him? His disease has gotten worse. Best of luck with you Arthur. Guards, arrest these two kings. I will deal with the machine. We will both deal with him. Nothing, it was all a bad dream. You have to get past the under, under, under, keep. He is the baddest knight. That is Lord Underkeep to you. So you mean he is the drawbridge guy. Untie me. Sorry Underkeep, not this time. I though I got rid of you a long time ago, Vivian. Well you didnÕt. And I see, you brought one of your mental patients. Wheel him back off to the loony bin. As for him, wheel him back to prison. It took us a while to build Camelot but we built it over some underground tunnels. That is my home. Oh, so we will be nearby. You were his parents a long time ago and you shall be his parents forever. Welcome to the family. You are the next guy to get married.
The end.
A valentine gift to remember
I am the scorpion queen. Guodo, come here with my son. Yes my Queen. Here, here, is you..your ÉsoÉson. So I see you are afraid of your Queen. Me afraid of my Queen, ridiculous. Release him Queen Scorpion. No he will grow up and be exactly like me. No he will grow up and be exactly like us. MeÉconfused. You are confused, we are confused. Let him go Queen Scorpion. No. What do you want with him. His soul. I donÕt have a spirit. I am only a machine. Then die. Me, no. If you are to become a god, then you must fight like a god. Me a god. You are being ridiculous. There is no such thing as spirits. Mother, if we are supposed to get married, then we are supposed to get married. So it was written. He became the only son of the gods. The great spirit had guarded him for 20 years. HmÉwhere did this candy come from. That is not candy. WhoshÉit is poison. So I see. You are jealous. The deal is you leave this forest and donÕt come back. Ok, I will go. Bye bye. I didnÕt know a god was protecting him. I just donÕt like that great spirit and his god friends. Then one day the Scorpion Queen appeared and she said these wordsÉif you want to be with me, then say so. He is my grandson. Grandma, I canÕt go with them, they are dangerous. Ridiculous grandson or not, they are friends of mine. Take care of him Doshia. Except Doshia died centuries ago. What are you babbling about? Wrong. Give us the right answer. The Scorpion Queen said to the Wolf Queen, Take care of my grandson. You get this fabulous prize. Doshi lied. I can not tell him the truth and I will not. You are not one of us. You have betrayed us. In the god world, you are a traitor, as in the mortal world. But, but, but, I can change. Wow, I never even imagined that the parade was to represent me as what. As the most powerful ruler in the galaxy. You silly goose. OhÉbahÉso I see, he called you a stinky head. You are a fatty fat head. I demand an apology, you come back here you little rodent. Are you trying to make me fat. No, why. You know what happens to those that lie. What is happening to me. You are not like the others, you are changing inside. In the ancient prophecy, they spoke of the most popular warrior. You are the chosen one. You must destroy him before he transforms. You knocked him out. Take him away. He is a disgrace to our kind. Oh, brotherÉyou said itÉwe have a long journey home. AhÉtherÉeÉÉis a dragon behind you. It is a monster, run. AhÉDonÕt eat me. You puny thing. Why would I eat you, when I could just squish you. Why are you doing this? How are you try to squish. He is ot yours to squish. Move aside god. No way monster. Run my grandson and do not look back. I wonder what I am going to find out there. OwÉSorryÉthat is my mistake. I am fine. What are you running from my friend? Face the dragon. Use my sword and donÕt turn back. In case we donÕt come back, I want you to have this. Thanks. I will teach you how to use my sword. Wow. This is sword. What did you think it was? I though it was a lollipop. But I guess it is now time. Get him inside the house. This is my battle. What are you doing to me? In the ancient prophecy, it says the blod of a dragon for the sick, the wounded and weak. I have bottled up this dragon blood forever. Take this bottle with you and donÕt come back. How will I know when the gods picked me. You will see. The great spirit wants to see you. WowÉhe told me I have to be careful of who back stabs me. You are now officially one of us. But again you have always been one of us. In the end, gods rule, people donÕt.
The end.